Site navigation and social media links
An Open Letter To All My Fans - Finally I am Standing up for Myself
Blog | July 14, 2013
I didn’t think that I would have to deal with this, but it came to the point when I just have to stand up for myself. It came to my attention that my soon to be ex-husband wrote a post about our marriage in which he pictured me as an abusive monster that used him to get to Los Angeles only to dump him, dump BodyRock.Tv that we’ve build together and become a star. My stomach literally turned upside down when I read all of those horrible things he wrote about me that are absolutely not true. I keep being bullied by this man who took literally everything from me.
Here is my side of the story. Freddy and I have build BodyRock.Tv a fitness/personal blog that became very successful. We traveled, had fun, shot hundreds of workout videos that went viral on youtube. BodyRock.Tv was a very successful business that was making us a lot of money. It was insane. We had everything but home. I did not want to live in Canada and my husband did not want to live in Prague. We tried a little country in Mediterranean – Malta, but it still didn’t feel like home to either of us. In 2011 we were contacted by a large talent agency and production company from Los Angeles to discuss a possible business opportunity. It sounded great and we were both excited to move to L..A.
We moved to Los Angeles in May 2011 and rented an expensive house in West Hollywood for the entire year. While we did not close a deal with the production company and did not get representation from the talent agency, we both felt strong about BodyRock.Tv and wanted to keep growing. Our relationship on the other hand was not at all in good shape. It was not because I was a monster wife that would physically and emotionally abuse my husband. We had serious issues that caused disconnection on my part. I was not happy about the creative direction of our videos and the way I was being portrait and perceived. While I was happy about the numbers on youtube and growing business I was feeling more and more embarrassed about my sexualized image. Don’t get me wrong, I like sexy, and confident, but I don’t enjoy having camera close up my cleavage and elsewhere. That was also a reason why we did not get any sponsorships or representation by any large talent agency despite of the popularity online. I felt like our goals were different. I wanted a clean family friendly blog that people wouldn’t be embarrassed to share with their friends, and Freddy wanted to see bigger numbers. I felt like I was being controlled in every aspect of my life. I didn’t even have my own cellphone for the first few months in Los Angeles. Apparently it wasn’t needed. If anyone wanted to talk to me, they can call my husbands cell phone.
Another issue in our relationship was our intimacy. I was not as physical with my husband as he wanted me to be which led to frustrations on his part and disappointment and disconnection on mine. I couldn’t get a hug from him to be comforted, without him being sexual with me. I could no longer imagine to have family with this man. I knew that I would not be able to look into my children’s eyes and tell them that their dad is the love of my life.
I decided that the best thing for both of us would be to separate as a couple and remain best friends and business partners. While I can’t deny that Freddy was devastated by my decision, it was not true that he had to leave to his home town in Canada. I told him that our house was big enough for both of us. We had two separate bedrooms. I offered him that I would help him to get through the changes and that I would not be the first one to date other people if he decides to stay. I wanted him to be happy and I wanted us to keep growing BodyRock.Tv.
He decided to leave me in Los Angeles and went back to his home town in Canada with his family. I was fine with that and I have to say that I felt relieved and was excited for the new beginnings. Freddy and I were in touch every day and talked about BodyRock.Tv and how we are going to continue as business partners. We agreed on bringing in other girls as hosts of the workout videos. However my idea of hiring a camera guy to shoot my workout videos was denied by my husband. No one was allowed to shoot videos of me. That’s why you could see me doing only short intros to the workouts having my camera on tripod. I was also doing some nutrition and diet posts, but I felt very limited by not having anyone to help me. We were both feeling overwhelmed by the change, because we were used to working together and we were very good at working together.
Things got very tough when his new girlfriend Lisa Marie came to the picture. While I thought that him having a new girlfriend, a person that will be there for him, will make things a lot easier, I was wrong. Up until then, we were friends, partners and we were getting along. If you were following BodyRock.Tv back then you must have noticed that I have basically vanished right after her very first post. In December 2011, Freddy’s attitude towards me changed completely. He became incredibly mean, he denied me an access to BodyRock.Tv and all the social media we’ve build together. Since I had no access to our Canadian business account, and owned only 49% of the company, I was relying on him to pay me monthly dividends. My future was completely in his hands. When I asked for my dividends he told me to first sign a non-compete agreement. What that means is that I wouldn’t be allowed to ever have my own fitness blog or to ever do a workout video online. I felt like I was being controlled again and threatened on top of that. It was never my intension to leave BodyRock.Tv. I was forced to leave to keep my independence and dignity. He told me to lawyer up and the last email I got from him stated exactly this: “I want you to sell the company car that your mom is using. Aww, isn’t it horrible that your mom that has nothing won’t even have the car?” That my friends right there was the end of our friendship. I couldn’t believe it. Of course I did not sell the car and my mom still has it.
What happened next is that he wrote a post on BodyRock.Tv that would portray me as a bad person that betrayed him in every possible way. He wrote that he was being forced and manipulated to write the post about us breaking up. That was the post with the picture of us sitting on the front step of the house in West Hollywood. Just to let you know, nobody was forcing him to write what he did. While I was pushing for him to post the truth about us not being a couple, he wanted to write it in his own words and told me not to let anyone know that I left him. I was fine with that.
At that time, I decided that I will not give up and that I will continue doing what I love and he or nobody else will ever stop me. I contacted Darren from Watch it now entertainment, explained him the entire situation and asked him if he wants to be my partner. We clicked as friends immediately and we were on the same page when it comes to fitness, blogging and my image as a trainer. I got hired by his company and got my work visa instantly. After that, you know the story. We started shooting ZWOWs and I tried to get back on my feet. I can never thank Darren and his team at Watch It Now Entertainment enough, who all helped me when I had absolutely nothing. I am also forever thankful to my boyfriend who stood by me the entire time and gave me the kind of love and home that I have always dreamed off.
I filed for divorce in January 2012, however I am still waiting for the divorce to happen, because my husband is way too power hungry and wants my 49% of BodyRock.Tv which he thinks is worth his signature on our divorce papers and nothing more. I was also threatened by a letter from his lawyer that I might be deported back to Czech Republic if I won’t stop doing ZWOWS and sign the non-compete agreement with BodyRock.Tv. I guess he assumed that I didn’t get my visa.
I have received way more abuse from him in the form of online bullying. He said so many bad things about me on his Facebook and other social media and I have never stood up for myself. For some weird reason I thought that he is really not that kind of person and that maybe he’s just very hurt that I left him. I thought that he is being like that because he’s probably suffering. Now it got to the point that I am hundred percent certain that all that crap he writes about me is his cover up to justify the fact that he took everything from me and have been actively trying to destroy my career and my online presence. Here he is again with another post trying to hurt me. He didn’t take the most important part of me though–my faith, love, and will power.
Private Member |
Dear Zu!
I am SO GLAD YOU WROTE THIS!!!
When you and F broke up, I was devastated, it was like my parent’s divorce all over again, loosing the image and illusion of WONDERFUL COUPLE breaking apart again. I was on your side, wrote a blogpost about that on my blog and immediately stopped following BR.tv on Youtube, but still was visiting the website for old videos. For more than a year after you left I was not able to leave your old workouts, I was used to that, to you, to your voice, your attitude, your personality and I was still hoping you will get back together (wrong type of wish, I know) and the BR.tv will keep going as at the old times. I am so glad it didn’t happen. True is that I was not able to connect with you after you came back with ZWOWs, for some reason the old “bodyrock” format of videos (HIITs, using the old equipment I bought because of you), so I only did a few of your ZWOWs. At the same time I was seeing awful changes on BR.tv, starting with DISGUSTING boob and ass shots, LM working out in her underwear and later her physical changes, to me it seemed like F wants to create a new “you,” turn LM to a copy of YOU and that was SO CREEPY TO ME!!!
I have to say that I never followed OR liked your nutritional advices, but I think that is okay, because everyone’s body is different and not everything you say is good for everyone (and I believe you agree with that and not seeing it as “hating”). But your workouts always worked for me and I will always have a soft spot for you because YOU (not you and F, not Bodyrock.tv), YOOOOOOOOOU were the one who got me moving, who got me motivated, who trained me online for more than 3 years and who I was looking forward to watch every single day, I hanged your picture on the wall (yeah, creepy, I know) and I was so motivated, not to LOOK LIKE YOU (my bodytype is slightly different and I know I will never have a body like you), but to WORK MY ASS OFF under your influence, which I think was HUGE for many people. You inspired, you motivated, you always pushed us to KEEP GOING and also you kept going even though your life was not always just rainbows and butterflies.
At one point I started following you too, because I started a different type of training and honestly I didn’t feel as connected to you as I used to be.
F was always playing a victim, like he was the one who is hurt and devastated and like YOU were the b*tch who abandoned him for money, for fame…
I am sorry that I have ever doubted you in HOW THE STORY REALLY WENT. When two people are going apart (I am divorced too, so I know exactly what you are talking about), nothing is really clear until you hear both sides of the story. You never attacked him for anything, and he was constantly saying bad stuff about you (I remeber some post about how he is glad you two didnt have kids, it was something about “demon child” or something like that, really gross stuff). I believe that what you say in this post is 100% true and it gave me confidence to stand by you once again. It also opened my eyes a bit and explained me WHY you did things you did (like working with people you do now, charging for workouts and stuff…), and I can see the whole thing in a completely different light.
A lot of hugs and kisses from Czech Republic :-*
Nina
Private Member |
Nina, im so glad to hear from you. You were one of my fave bodyrockers at the time. I hope everything is doing well for you.
I agree with everyhting you said. I too had doubts about Zuzka, but i am so glad that finally Zuzka spoke up for us and told the REAL truth about this drama.
God bless you Zuzka and keep doing what you do best.
P.S. I will never forget your line every intro of BR…
“Hi guys…..” 🙂
Private Member |
una persona così avresti dovuto lasciarla tu molto prima,ma ora forza coraggio e tanti allenamenti 😉
Private Member |
Hey Zuzka, I am very thankful for you to have posted the entire story from your perspective. I’ve been following Bodyrock since summer 2011 and even before you split up, I noticed the distance between you two. After you seperated, things went so fast with Lisa-Marie leading the workouts and I … just didn’t feel home on the website any more. Everyone realized something was up when you first said you wouldn’t be the host any more, then said you would post diet tips and then vanished completely without further notice. I tried to adapt to the new hosts for 1 or 2 months because I love HIITs, but I disliked the way the website turned out more and more. In the back of my mind, I always wanted to know what happened to you, Zuzka.
Soon, I deleted Bodyrock on all platforms (Youtube, Facebook, book mark). I have worked out with your old workouts and the day I discovered your new channel on Youtube, I literally jumped through my room in joy. While I really would have liked some explanation for the whole situation from your side, it still is none of my business and if you didn’t want to talk about it, this was of course fine by me. Last month, I have somehow ended up at the latest Bodyrock video and at first I thought what kind of weird girl this was and then she introduced herself as Lisa-Marie. I didn’t even recognize her any more with all her plastic surgery! After 1 minute, I had enough of boob and butt watching and shut the window.
All I want to say with this post is that you are always inspiring me to be my very best, Zuzka. This applies for both my physical and my psychological level. I don’t know how the clicks are right now, but the way you have set up your new company definitely secures you the more human followers who love you for your work and your personality, and not your boob size.
Private Member |
Z! Of course he wants 49% of the company…he has to support all those lip injections and multiple boob job re-dos! 😉
Stay strong, girlie! Love your workouts and will always support you!
Much love,
Y
Private Member |
You are so brave for putting the truth out there, because realistically it is no one else’s business but your own. I admire you for having remained private and respectful but I completely understand why you said what you said and appreciate the honesty. I try to always remain non-judgmental and give people the benefit of the doubt, but clearly you have been mis-treated and I’m so glad you’ve remained true to yourself and stayed positive and strong. You deserve happiness and good will and I know that’s what you will receive. You have all of our support and love behind you as I’m sure you can already tell from the previous posts.
Please know that you’re not only helping people achieve fitness and weight-loss. You’ve also helped me overcome and exercise addiction and aided in my eating disorder recovery. You’ve proved that you don’t need to exercise for hours at a time to get fit, your workouts are fun, challenging and full of variety, and the recipes you post are easy to make, healthy and delicious. You’re authentic, sweet, humble and funny. You keep things real and entertaining and it’s obvious you truly care about your followers. I’m not sure the same can be said for “certain others.”
We love you, Z. Keep on doing what you’re doing.
Private Member |
He is a bully, plain and simple, Z. Do NOT let this man and his lies drag you down. Stay positive and truthful and the “crap”, as they say, will sink to the bottom. I never cared for Body Rock because it is so overly sexualized. In my opinion, this is because he doesn’t respect women, very jealous of your success and is extremely immature.
Rock On, Zuzka!!!!
Private Member |
You are amazing!!! You keep doing what you do and we are all with you Z! Love you girl 🙂
Private Member |
zuzka. i so f… understand you and im with you 🙂 if people follow you since bodyrock they all know what is going on. im not here to judge but i must say this .. thru the camera i could see some properties of freddy. especially when lisa marie came. suddenly she got big boobs, lips, smaller nose,..and why all of this a sudden?! i wont say anything else, im sure that you know what i want to say. and if my boyfriend would every month tell stories about his ex on his blog i would kick his ass definetely. so, i think both of you, you Zuzka and lisa marie, are very incredible women who endure this man and his stupid reckless acts. plus you are amazing in lots of ways 🙂 never give up and we wont have to kill you! lol ;DDDDD besos, anita
Private Member |
Z!!! You are so brave and honest. Sometimes you have to stand up for yourself and thank you for doing so. I have lost interest in BodyRock after you left. It is not the same!!!
It is so GOOD to see you back on social media being happy and being the kind, lovely, amazing person you are. I am with you 100% also regarding the videos.
You know that you are loved and will always have my support. I can not wait to ZWOW with you tomorrow :).
Private Member |
Zuzka,
I’m sorry Freddy is acting like that. I wouldn’t know b/c when you left BodyRock I left BodyRock.
I didn’t sweat through all those BodyRock workouts b/c I liked the camera work. I did it b/c there was this upbeat, genuine, powerful woman who made me want to “push really, really hard.” And that’s why I was ecstatic when I discovered Zuzka Light.
You are an inspiration to a whole lot of Warriorz who love you for what you give us – inspiration, hope, strength, killer workouts, recipes … you name it. Hopefully we can inspire you to stay strong and positive through these rougher times.
“The purpose of our lives is to be happy.” – Dalai Lama