You’re not alone. Juggling work, self-care, relationships, family, health, and money is no easy task. At some point or another, you will feel like you’ve reached your limit. This is more than stress. It’s burning the candle at both ends and waiting for the inevitable crash and burn. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, here are ways to deal with it and keep your bubble from bursting. These are all based the recommendations of many experts, from therapists to meditation masters. 

First, Step Away

The moment you start to feel yourself caving in, step away, and give time to yourself. No exceptions, unless it’s an emergency. Do not be afraid to ask for a quick bathroom break or moment to make an important “call” as an excuse. This time out can be just a few minutes or an hour if you can afford it. But step out of the situation and use the micro-break to check yourself.

During this time, start becoming aware of what’s going on. With your mind, reel in those thoughts. What’s going on? Do you feel anxious, scared, irritable, depressed, or mad? Write all of them down if you can. Do something to validate those emotions and put them on paper and observe. Write to yourself and work through your feelings of being overwhelmed. Maybe you’ll discover what’s triggering them, or what needs to be done to improve them. If journaling isn’t enough, don’t hesitate to get help. Speak to a counselor, therapist, or someone you trust. Ask for help as much as possible. You don’t have to carry the weight alone, and talking things out is better than letting them build up inside.

Mindfulness, From Head to Toe

 With your body, practice what’s known as a “body scan meditation,” which helps you to notice where you’re physically carrying any tension. Once you’ve identified the areas of stress, you can start to loosen them up. The UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center (MARC) provides both step-by-step instructions on how to do it as well as an audio-guided version of it. Check it out here. 

Meditation itself is a good practice when dealing with things like anxiety and being overwhelmed. I like to call it “exercise for your mind.” People often picture meditation as sitting cross-legged and chanting like a monk. In reality, meditation is about re-focusing your mind and getting you to stop being distracted by your thoughts. And there’s more than one way to do it. There’s the traditional mindfulness meditation, as well as breathing exercise. Then you have physical activities like yoga and Tai Chi. Some people even find walking to be a form of meditation. Whatever gets you out of your head is what’s going to de-clutter the stress, tension, and feelings of overwhelm. If that means challenging yourself in an intense workout, then do that. Or, if you need to lie down and listen to a meditation app, then that works, too.

(For more on the benefits of meditation and my favorite app, read my post here. I also have a 10-minute meditation for inner strength that you can check out here.) 

RAINDROP

A good exercise for practicing mindfulness is the RAINDROP meditation, which was first coined by Michele McDonald, a meditation expert and co-founder of the Vipassana Buddhist temple in Hawaii. [1] RAINDROP goes as follows: 

R: Recognition (What is happening?)

A: Acceptance (Can I accept that it’s happening?)

I: Interest (Can I bring genuine interest to what’s happening?)

N: Non-Identification (Is this happening to “me,” or is it simply happening?)

D: Distraction (The opposite of recognition- am I aware of my experience?)

R: Resistance (The opposite of acceptance- am I resisting reality?)

O: Obliviousness (The opposite of interest. Do I care about what’s happening?)

P: Personification (The opposite of non-identification. Am I taking things personally?)

[2] 

Create a Better Environment 

Look around you. Is your environment holding you back? Do you have any clutter that might be making you feel trapped in a cage? While you can’t change your circumstances, you do have some control of where you’re at. If it’s at home or in an office, find ways to cultivate a more soothing environment. Hang up pictures of things that inspire or make you happy. Play your favorite music or podcast in the background. How about aromatherapy? Diffuse some essential oils like lavender and chamomile, to encourage relaxation. 

Disconnect to Re-Connect

In order to handle the situation, you need to have a strong connection with yourself. If it’s gotten weak, then you need to disconnect and find ways to re-connect with yourself. And the best way to do that is by heading out into nature. Taking a quick walk at the park or a long hike is a tried and true method for handling stress and re-aligning with yourself. It’s so effective that healthcare professionals refer to it as nature therapy. [3] In Japan, it’s called Shinrin-Yoku, which, translated, means “forest bathing.” [4] Both methods have evidence showing their ability to improve mental well-being, relieve stress, and help people cope with modern living. [5]

 Remember Self-Care

We often get overwhelmed after neglecting our own needs. It’s like watering a plant. Over time, it begins to wilt. Our well-being is no different. The more we forget to “water” ourselves with personal time, exercise, healthy diet, and rest, the greater the burden we carry from life. In my post about the importance of self-care, I went over the “ripple effect” of poor self-care that influences our relationships, goals, and outlook. How can we expect to be a better parent, boss, or partner if we’re not well? How can we be present and ready to take on challenges if we can barely keep ourselves together? If you’re feeling overwhelmed, take a moment to reflect. Ask yourself, “Have I taken care of my own needs today?” Did you work out, eat a healthy meal, laugh, smile, or do at least one good thing for yourself? Do you even plan to? If not, schedule some one-on-one time. Sooner rather than later.

Sources: 

[1] https://vipassanahawaii.org/teachers/
[2] https://learn.tricycle.org/courses/rain
[3] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolutionary-psychiatry/201608/nature-therapy
[4] http://www.shinrin-yoku.org/shinrin-yoku.html
[5] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5580555/