I remember playing a game once at a party where we would read aloud questions that were printed on special little cards. Sort of like conversation starters. And one of the questions was: Would you choose to be significantly smarter if it meant that you’d have to weigh 40 more pounds?

It was a silly game and a silly question. But it popped into my head when I was reading a new book I bought just recently for my Kindle – Mindset: The new Psychology of Success. The book was all about the “myth of intelligence” and the way that we can define our own “smarts” just by the way we view them.

We often think of intelligence as something fixed that can be measured, just like a number on a scale. We might think that being smart is like having a beautiful singing voice, something that you’re born with and can’t be changed. But in reality, that’s pretty limiting.

The book explains that intelligence isn’t about an IQ number at all, and why it’s not just our abilities and talent that bring us success—but whether we approach them with a fixed or growth mindset.

1. Stronger United: Intelligence is a bunch of abilities working together. Being really good at math might get you a good score on your SATs, but that alone doesn’t make you smart. You have to be able to observe, plan, judge, communicate, know details, be proactive and a problem solver, etc. And those are all things you can work on and grow. Hence the next point…

2. Grow Your Intelligence: In the book the author, Carol Dweck, describes two ways of looking at intelligence. One way is that it’s a fixed amount, an ability that is given to you. But the other way of looking at it is that your intelligence is based on abilities which can be developed by effort, curiosity, and experiences.

3. Smart Is as Smart Does: Intelligence is practical and intuitive. The more you do and the more experiences you have, the more you know. Once you learn new skills and master them, the more you’ll react intelligently without even thinking. You’ll just know when someone needs a friend. You’ll just react and take the correct turn. You’ll just have the answers.

4. Brain Buddies: You can learn and grow when you’re working with, for, and around other people. Other people have different viewpoints, idea, visions, and knowledge. Collaborating and brainstorming can be invaluable. Often, more ingredients make a more delicious soup.

I find those points to be incredibly inspiring. I like thinking of my intelligence as something I can work on. Here are some of my favorite set of habits that can help you develop your intelligence :

1. Be persistent.
2. Don’t be negatively impulsive. Meaning, don’t get upset and quit when things get hard. Don’t act without properly thinking things through. Don’t lose your patience.
3. Be understanding, empathetic, and a good listener. You can’t learn anything from others if you’re always talking and judging.
4. Think outside of the box. Try to look at problems from a fresh angle.
5. Be mindful. Take time to asses your behavior and thoughts (past and present) and what’s motivating them.
6. The devil is in the details. Do your research. Make lists. Be on time. If you start something, finish it. Be on top of your game.
7. Don’t be afraid to ask for help or how. Find people who are really good at stuff and ask them how they did it.
8. Be a good communicator. Speak and write with clarity and kindness.
9. Try things you’re not comfortable doing, but within reason. It seems silly to bungee off a cliff just to be “extreme”. But don’t be afraid to take a class, make a new friend, or ask a question.
10. Be able to laugh at yourself and find the humor in stressful situations.
11. Never stop learning! There’s always more out there. We are so lucky to be free to explore new ideas and skills.

So, does thinking of your intelligence in this way change how “smart” you think you are? Are you inspired to get out there and try some new stuff? I’d love to hear your thoughts.